I have been in Korea for over one year now and I know enough Korean to get by; survival Korean. I can order food, get food delivered to my apartment, ask for directions, the basic stuff that you need for daily living. Often times, through context clues, I understand what someone is saying to me or asking me but in no way am I conversational in Korean.
However, that being said, I feel confident in the little Korean I know. My pronunciation is good, because I am an audio learner, meaning I hear and repeat. It is easy for me. I have also been told that I speak really well. Obviously, I make mistakes, it isn't my first language but I try and often I speak and pronounce correctly. What gets to me are the Korean people who ignore me speaking Korean. Not all Koreans do this but it happens enough that I started noticing it more and more.
For instance, if I am out with the boyfriend, they will often ignore me and ask him to order for us. If I start to order, they look at him for confirmation and for him to order again. I get over-looked. It also happens when there is a Korean-American in the mix. One of my friends is Korean-American, and speaks a decent amount of Korean, and she is the one that the waitresses or store clerks look to. They almost always try to speak with the Korean.
I can understand to some extent wanting to speak to the person who speaks more Korean. It is easier in some ways. However, you would think that when I was alone, they would speak to me and not ignore me. That is not the case. I often get into taxi's because I am running late for work and need to ride in a taxi. I know for a fact that I say my school name correctly, but it never fails, the taxi driver always asks me to repeat it. After which, they say something attune to, OHHHHHH, NONG-GO! Like I was saying the name incorrectly. Drives me nuts.
If you ask most expats, who have been in Korea for a while, you will know that the taxi drivers aren't the nicest people in Korea. They are some of the worst actually. Rude and disrespectful of non-Koreans. Happens all the time. So, one might assume that their behavior is normal and not something to take to heart but there is more.
If I go into a store, often (not always) the clerks will not even try to speak to me. They will cower away and fight among themselves to see who will come and talk with me. Then, I will tell them what I am looking for. This is met in one of two ways. 1. Eyes as big as saucers, like I just spoke English to them and not Korean. 2. Oh, right this way. Here this is good or what about this one. Sales clerks are hit or miss and they do try more than the taxi drivers.
I guess what really gets to me is the fact that Koreans see the white face and foreignness of myself and assume I will not speak Korean. I try but sometimes, I feel like it isn't enough.
The boyfriend and I have talked about this at length because he does not understand how I get along without him. He complains that he always orders for us and blah blah blah. I have told him multiple times that the reason for this isn't for lack of trying to order but because they ignore me. He finally understands now, but only after I did an experiment with a waitress. We were out to dinner at a bossam place (steamed pork), and we needed more garlic. I told him, I would ask for more garlic and he could see what I mean (because the whole, me not ordering thing came up at dinner). So, I get the waitresses attention, and she comes over and immediately looks at the boyfriend for what we need. I then say, in perfect Korean, "more garlic, please." She ignores me and keeps looking at the boyfriend. I say it again, this time louder but nothing. Finally, the boyfriend tells her the same thing and she smiles, walks away, and brings us garlic. He looked at me, dumbfounded, like he had just learned something new.
Now, I am not saying that all Koreans are this way. I have met plenty of Koreans, who will speak to me and try to have conversations with me, in Korean. They compliment me on my Korean or try to help me with it. There is this awesome sales clerk at Skinfood, who speaks no English but she always helps me and tries to understand my Korean. The owner of the CU down from my house is one of the nicest men ever. When I first moved here, he taught me how to count money in Korean. Not all people ignore the foreigner trying to speak Korean but it happens enough that it bothers me.
It also makes me wonder. Does this happen in America? I tell my kids that as long as they try and speak English, English speakers will try and understand them. If they get out the main points of their sentences or ideas, then we can understand them. I stress this to them but at some level, I wonder if we will actually do that. I know I do that and did that before. I try to understand others but can I say the same for my countrymen? I guess, it is just hard sometimes being in a country and culture where you don't speak the language and you are so obviously an outsider.
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